There, I said it. Now, I just have to believe it. This is Friday. The rock of our family, the glue holding our little group together, is gone. With Dad, 6 or so years ago, it was expected; he had been ill in the hospital and had lingered awhile. When he went, he was ready.
This? Not so. One of the problems of living in New England while half the family, including Mom, lives in usually-rubbing-it-in-your-face sunny Florida, is that you’re not in the loop of what’s going on. I last saw her at Dad’s funeral, and she was feisty, independent, and proud of her new lifestyle and her community, showing us around. But, apparently, in the last year or so, things changed for the worse—she stopped driving, lost weight, was tired for a long time, had even reluctantly let one of my sisters, Mickey, do her shopping and help with the chores, signs of change. Mickey lived near her, and could check on her. In fact, being able to help Mom in time of need, to be there for her, was why Mickey and husband Pat moved to Florida.
Mick checked, and Mom needed to go to the hospital. A scary but routine bit, so we were told. Not so routine. They found serious problems, potentially fixable if she was younger and if it was just 1. She wasn’t, and it was 2. So, no fixing, live out the remaining time (a few months to 2 years, she was told) with Mick and Pat, relaxed, enjoying being with family in whatever time the Creator granted her. Her last day at the hospital, she was doing better, even eating well. I was hoping to visit in the fall or around Christmas. One or two good days at Mick’s house, ready to settle in, get stronger, maybe strong enough to return to her home. And then—gone. Just like that.
I wait now to go say a last goodbye. Only then will it be real………maybe.
Mom, I thought we had more time with you, but that Irish sneakiness of yours had you slip away unseen. You’re reunited with Dad, but you’re going to have to listen to his cornball jokes again. Even God groans at his jokes, and God has heard them all.
I love you and I miss you already. I will see you again when God wills it.